Life is pretty darn confusing, if you ask me. I usually make it a point to adapt relatively quickly, but that, as I recently found out, only works out when things don’t clump together. Dealing with one thing at a time isn’t too hard, even if they impact you significantly, but when the dam breaks and a torrential swell of water comes rushing head-on at you from seemingly out of nowhere, you start to waiver. It doesn’t matter how strong you are: you’re susceptible. When old memories and long-forgotten emotions are reawakened, it’s hard on your brain and your soul. You’d wish that the dam was built just a tad stronger, but it’s too late for that sort of thinking now. At this point, you just have to deal with it. You try to make sense of your new situation; so you write and hope that it all starts to click at some point. It might take a really long time and sometimes you just need to take a step back, take a huge breath and slow down. This is what I’m going through right now and believe me – it REALLY sucks. Too many things coming way too fast – all of which are important to me. Every step could be a misstep at this point and I can’t tolerate any more “mistakes”. Please, let me pick up the pieces of my previously shattered life and simmer before we continue.
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